sometimes all you can do is let it engulf you. because at some point you become powerless to fight it, it becomes more immense then you can be. it becomes so intense that not even the most hardened can fight it it feels like there is a building crumbling around you and you have to hold it up alone. you try your best not to let it smother you but the more you fight it the stronger it gets and it doesn't stop getting stronger. Then there comes a point where it just breaks through all your shields and walls and the only thing you feel is pain and a desperate agony. The only thing you can think of is you want it to stop, to all go away because eventually it is such pain that your body itself starts to crumble and you lose control and it is no longer your own body to control as it writhes and thrashes against what you feel because no its not going to end and no there is nothing you can do about it. The moment of complete and utter hopelessness where all you can ask is why ? and you no longer have the strength to stand up you no longer have the strength to move or to eat ... you just ... can no longer do it. That is the pain of a lost love ... a love so lost that you can no longer find it in the dark. and the only thing you can do is give up and hope you will heal.

but you never will... never not fully ... the wounds will be stitched shut and will seal themselves over time ... but there will always be the scar an ugly truth about yourself that you will carry with you for the rest of your life ... now i know what it means to love .... to truly love and have it all break down before your eyes.

Jaded completely

outclassed
10:41 AM